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As we look at the idea of continuity through change, it suggests that as we grow and develop we become more of who we are. One perfect example of this concept comes to us in the form of Sue Schor, a newly-dedicated – for the second time – counsellor at LifeLine/Childline Western Cape.
I chatted to Sue about her interesting journey through life and LifeLine/Childline Western Cape, and felt quite inspired by her dedication, her humility and her willingness always to grow.
“A while ago, I was at a difficult time in my life, and I needed someone to help me think some things through clearly. I decided to call LifeLine, and I found a fairly new counsellor on the line and he was lovely. During the course of the conversation, I told him that I used to be a counsellor for LifeLine and he asked me if I would consider being a counsellor again. I thought about it, and then I thought that maybe I would!” Sue said.
“My children and grandchildren all live overseas and I was experiencing a form of ‘empty nest’ syndrome, I suppose. It felt important to me to be to be valuable again – to something, someone – and to be myself, back in that space at LifeLine/Childline Western Cape,” she said.
What makes Sue’s story unique is that 26 years ago, she did the LifeLine personal growth course in Cape Town, for the first time. She chose to do the course as a growth course; a friend had done the course and had recommended it to her. Sue chose not to continue after the personal growth course, as she was still had personal issues that needed to be sorted through before she felt the time right for her.
Sometime later, she decided to do the personal growth course again. “Every time I do that course [Sue later facilitated on a number of LifeLine courses], there is a life-changing moment. You find that you develop in a different way and this course helps you to find where you are. I went on to counsel, and then I did that for about ten or eleven years,” Sue said. She also facilitated on many occasions, and met some wonderful people on her journey with LifeLine. Glynis Depper, current chairperson of LifeLine/Childline Western Cape , being one of them. “I felt very privileged doing what I was doing,” Sue said.
And then Sue decided to take a break from LifeLine/Childline Western Cape, and that break put an end to that part of her LifeLine journey. She devoted her time to her two children that she was bringing up; she took up bowls and got involved in activities that involved meeting new people. “It was a different time in my life,” Sue said.
So when Sue called LifeLine that evening, a year or two ago, she felt she was at a cross roads in her life, and thought that doing the LifeLine course might be just what she needed.
“The first part of the course was wonderful, it helped me to find myself, to think about some things and to learn to adapt and to accept things you cannot have,” she said.
“I did the first part of the course for purely selfish reasons; there is an amazing feeling you get when you walk into that [training] room upstairs, it is the most incredible space. It could be the building’s spiritual beginnings, maybe. There is a feeling about it, I was smitten by it and I realised this is where I feel valuable. And I felt it was a challenge for me to see if I still had it in me [to counsel]! So I went on to try the rest of the course again. I think I had to come to terms with the fact that maybe I did not have what it takes any more – this was a fear of mine, but it seems that I did!” Sue said.
Having come through selection successfully, it was back to the telephone lines for Sue, this time as a probationer counsellor.
“As nervous as I was the first time, there were no different feelings this time. I was just as nervous. However, the support that we receive from the counselling department is so helpful. I think the supervision is absolutely marvellous, and the supervision sessions have been wonderful. I was not aware of this being available when I counselled the first time. I think this is absolutely amazing and I think it is important to get more people [existing LifeLine counsellors] involved in coming to supervision. For me it is a time of emotional recharge and that [supervision] group gives you that for sure,” she said.
“I am getting better at the telephone calls! The interviews with Sharon [counselling manager] helped me a lot too; my biggest fear is doing or saying something wrong on the lines. Sharon told me that I might say something wrong, but my heart is right and that is what is important to the caller, and the caller will pick that up. Being allowed to be human is so liberating! Sharon’s encouragement makes a world of difference,” Sue said.
Answering Childline calls has been a new experience for Sue, as Childline was not part of the telephone counselling service when she counselled before. She finds these a challenge, and would love to see this service being offered in all the provincial languages, as there is such a need.
On the LifeLine counselling lines, Sue has found that the issues that people call about are not very different from those when she counselled previously. And this again comes back to the idea of continuity through change: we might live in a very different society and world today, with many different and changed external influences, but people are people and our issues – with ourselves and with each other – never really change.
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