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~ Cherishing children
is the mark of a civilized society ~
Joan Ganz Cooney
It is 8.00 am on Monday morning. Shelley, Laura
and Chanelle are gathered around Jenny's desk.
They give her a list of the week's appointments
and take time to chat and connect with each other
before the day begins.
Chanelle: We're
so lucky here. We know each other really well;
we're not just a group of people who work together.
We offer each other emotional support and the
chance to off-load when we've dealt with a difficult
case. We also have a supervisor, a social worker
who comes in once a month to touch base and to
discuss our concerns and worries.
This small oasis of quiet time is valuable, because
at 8.30 the first client is booked, and from then
on the pace will be unrelenting.
Jenny: I try not
to book appointments before 8.30, but sometimes
I have to make them earlier, if people can't come
in at any other time. Ideally, I try to schedule
half an hour between counselling sessions, for
paper work and to allow counsellors a chance to
regroup, but things get very hectic, and this
isn't always possible!
There are five offices in the centre. Shelley
is the centre manager, and she works there in
the mornings. Jenny is the receptionist as well
as being a qualified LifeLine counsellor. Chanelle
and Laura have their own offices. An educational
reflexologist comes in once a week to work with
clients who are undergoing trauma debriefing.
She also works with cases involving sexual abuse
and domestic violence. Whenever a room is free,
it is used by LifeLine volunteers. Chanelle, an
auxiliary social worker and Laura, a qualified
social worker, deal mainly with children, although
they do work with adults as well. Shelley, Jenny,
Laura and Chanelle are all qualified LifeLine
counsellors so they are able to fill in for each
other whenever necessary.
Each counsellor also facilitates on one Personal
Growth and one Counselling Skills course per year.
These take place at a community centre elsewhere
in Bishop Lavis in the afternoons and the evenings.
Laura: I love
doing these courses, especially when I think of
the new LifeLine counsellors who will be doing
volunteer work here at our centre!
The counsellors also present workshops for the
social work students who come to the centre for
practical experience.
The centre closes at 4.00p.m.
Chanelle: We deal
with everything here.....
We assess survivors of sexual abuse, liaise with
members of the South African police and the Child
Protection Unit. We have a good relationship with
the police and are able to tell them when we feel
a child is ready to appear in court. Sometimes
this can be a long process. We work very much
at the pace of the child, and never pass on information
to the police, or even the parents, until the
child gives us permission to do so. The rapport
we build with the child during this time is precious,
and we do nothing to jeopardise the trust placed
in us. Often, when we are assessing cases of sexual
abuse, other issues surface and we discover the
need to refer the child or the parents for further
counselling. So we also work very closely with
other organisations, clinics, and psychologists.
In the mornings Chanelle does counselling, in
the afternoons she works on the Youth Training
programmes.
Chanelle: Appointments
with children run for forty-five minutes to an
hour, sometimes a little longer. When it comes
to trauma debriefing, more time is needed. The
work here is usually done with older children.
It's a process which can't be stopped once it
has started, and these sessions can go on for
as long as two and a half hours. We encourage
people to make weekly, if not twice weekly, appointments
for trauma debriefing. We can't begin debriefing
for forty-eight hours, what we call the containment
period. During this time, immediate feelings can
surface, and then we can begin the process of
taking people back to the event that caused the
trauma. Sometimes, all you want to do is put your
arms around someone and help them to calm down,
but they have to know that it's okay to cry, or
scream. This starts the process of building trust.
Chanelle: A distinction
needs to be made between trauma debriefing and
counselling. Often after the de-briefing, people
are able to get on with their lives because they
have come to terms with the trauma which has paralysed
them. If other problem areas surface during debriefing
then we recommend that the client come to us for
further counselling, or be referred to a specific
agency or specialist.
Although people do use the centre's crisis line
(021 934 4822) most of the work done at the centre
is face-to-face counselling, and they have an
open door policy.
Chanelle and Laura:
We often have situations which call for emergency
consultations. If for example someone comes in
who is suicidal, his or her needs will be assessed
immediately. Other appointments are put on hold
until the situation has been sorted out. We need
to assess whether the person can make it through
the rest of the day, or whether they need hospitalisation
or referral to a specialist.
Laura counsels and presents workshops and courses
in schools. She usually sees about 5 clients per
day, and she works mainly with children, from
the ages of 3 - 17. The basic counselling she
does incorporates the elements of play therapy
- especially in the cases of sexual abuse, where
the therapy is chosen to meet the needs of the
child.
Laura: Some children
like biblio-therapy. This means that they tell
their story, either verbally, or by writing it
down. I focus on their life history, get them
to construct a life-line. This helps me to look
at their background.
Laura: Sometimes,
when it's too painful for children to tell their
story, then I use dramatic play therapy. We play
'monster busting'. The children play with monster-like
toys, like spiders, and eventually they give names
to the monsters. I also use animals - give the
animals different qualities. Or the children give
the animal they are playing with a certain character.
For example, a lion maybe seen as being very strict,
sometimes even aggressive, and gradually he becomes
the father in the play. A nagging mother might
become a pig.
Laura: Children
don't really like role-playing, it cuts too close
to the bone for them. The introverted child often
prefers to write, and I incorporate all the art
forms, drawing, sticking, whatever helps them
to tell their story. With teenagers, I often use
relaxation play. I use exercises to help them
settle into the environment, breathing, relaxation,
meditation, so that they don't have to engage
immediately in a discussion of what has happened
to them. I often have music playing in the background.
In the pre-primary and primary schools, the focus
of the workshops is mainly sexual abuse. Children
learn about the different types of abuse, physical,
emotional, sexual and neglect. The counsellors
discuss "stranger danger", "good
secrets, bad secrets" and "good touch,
bad touch".
Chanelle: If a
child has died, or if there has been a rape, or
a shooting, or a suicide, we go to the school
and talk to the children who have been traumatised
by these events. We also run preventative programmes
in the schools. We present abuse workshops for
learners of all grades.
Laura: The workshops
are presented in the pre-primary, primary and
secondary schools. We have certain set programmes,
but these are altered according to the needs of
the school, and the age of the children we are
working with. In the high schools we focus on
life-skills, looking at issues like family values,
peer pressure and responsible problem solving.
We talk about things like sexual abuse, AIDS,
and date rape. These workshops are usually run
without the teachers being present. Sometimes
we are able to identify children who have behavioural
problems, and we can refer them to the Child and
Family Unit. We work with one class at a time,
otherwise the group becomes too big.
In the pre-primary and primary schools, the focus
of the workshops is mainly sexual abuse. Children
learn about the different types of abuse, physical,
emotional, sexual and neglect. The counsellors
discuss "stranger danger", "good
secrets, bad secrets" and "good touch,
bad touch".
Laura: Sometimes
children will come up to me after a session, and
talk to me, either because they are being abused
in some way, or because it is happening to one
of their friends. We then have to organise an
assessment, either at the Childline centre, or
at the Social Worker's office. The parents have
to be informed, unless the child is in danger
from a family member. In this case we take the
child to a place of safety and inform the police
about what is happening.
Chanelle: Often
children are more comfortable talking about their
problems with their peers. The Youth Development
programmes enable peer mediation and counselling.
They've been a wonderful success. I'd love to
see them taken further - there's so much scope
to do more. Yesterday I had three calls from schools
who wanted me to go in and run Youth Development
training. Each school or group we work with has
different needs, so it's a case of working out
what suits them. The children and school leaders
identify whom they want to attend the course and
then we work with these learners. We run a "Who
am I" course, which is very participative
and experiential, with no lectures, and lots of
role-playing, and self-discovery comes through
this.
Chanelle: The
learners who pass the course are then awarded
certificates at a special assembly, where they
take a pledge in front of the whole school. Then
we explain to the school how the peer counselling
will work. Learners can go to these children and
talk to them as peers about their problems. The
peer counsellors then liaise with a teacher or
school counsellor and take the situation from
there. As with all work that we do, confidentiality
is most important, and it is only with the permission
of the learner that information is divulged.
Chanelle: We work
very closely with the schools in our area and
the other care-giving organisations. We've been
very careful to ensure that our services do not
overlap with what another organisation does. In
conjunction with youth training we run weekend
Life Skills camps for learners. A pilot scheme
aimed at 16 -18 year olds is starting in October.
This will be a three-day camp, focusing on leadership
skills.
Laura: I've always
wanted to work with children and realised that
I could do this through social work. The hands-on
practical approach really appeals to me, and working
here certainly allows this. One of my lecturers
at UWC was an inspiration. She showed that it
was possible to get into the field, and do work
that really matters.
Chanelle: When
I was 13 I became leader of my scout pack! It
was then that I realised how much I enjoyed working
with children. After I qualified, I worked in
the corporate world for 15 years. But I had always
dreamed of being a child psychologist. I was still
working with the scouts and I got a call from
a LifeLine counsellor, who asked me if I would
encourage one of the children she was counselling
by getting him involved in scouts. This led to
my involvement in LifeLine, and I did the courses
and started volunteer work. I loved it so much,
I realised it was a true vocation. I had taken
maternity leave after my last child was born,
and I went for an interview - back in the corporate
world. I knew there was something wrong when I
realised that I was praying that I wouldn't get
the job! I decided to apply for a half day job
at the Bishop Lavis Centre, and when the Youth
Development programme was started, I applied for
that - in fact I sold myself, because I was so
keen to become involved in more youth work.
Laura: It's very
rewarding work, but it can also be very difficult.
Working with little children is hard, the three
to five year olds. Boys in the seven to thirteen
year age group battle with counselling. They're
struggling to find their identity and their role
in society. If they have been abused, they find
it hard to admit that they weren't able to defend
themselves - they think that boys are supposed
to be big and strong, that they're supposed to
be able to fight back. It takes time to break
through their defences, but the effort is really
worth it. I once worked with a group of boys,
all of whom had been abused. It started when the
aunt of one of the boys realised that there was
something funny about the things he was telling
her. He came for counselling, and he named two
other boys who had been molested by the same perpetrator.
They then named others, and eventually I was working
with eight children who had been abused. The results
of this were incredibly positive as far as the
community was concerned. The parents of all the
boys were very supportive, and they warned other
parents to protect their children against the
abuser.
Four women, a group of volunteers, and a centre
where the doors are always open. This is the LifeLine/Childline
Centre at Bishop Lavis. Never a dull moment, hard
work and the satisfaction of knowing that it's
work that makes a difference - to the children,
parents, teachers and caregivers of the community
they are part of.
Chanelle: Sometimes
I don't know whether I'm Arthur or Martha!
"All kids need is
a little help, a little hope and somebody who
believes in them."
~ Earvin "Magic"
Johnson
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